There are many of life’s lessons, events, and actions that give Derek the strength and understanding to help others who may be struggling. He is fortunate to have survived multiple suicide attempts, and seeks to support others to reach out to get help, despite of fear due to the the stigma around mental illness. He has experienced an unfathomable amount of pain, loss and tragedy, and has found a way to continuously embrace and enjoy life.
Mental illness effects everybody in some way, but for him it had always been a large part of his life since a very young age causing a lot of loss and grief in his life. He had a troubled childhood; including emotional and physical abuse, lost three family and countless friends by suicide. Mental health, and "how I was feeling" was something men did not talk about. He had always needed help with his mental health but was never able build enough courage to reach out to get help due to fear caused by the stigma around mental illness.
His first experience with death was his best friend and grandfather, who choose to cut his life short. Derek's first attempted was in 2007, multiple attempts would ensue. After overcoming a near fatal attempt in 2014, that required major surgery in order to live. He struggled to rejoin society. It took a long time to recover. He knew he still needed help. Yet, he did not talk about what it was like after this attempt, and how hard it was still for at that time. He just managed to get through life, always feeling like something was wrong, unsure of who he was.
After the loss of his mother in 2016 and a relapse that almost ended his life, he was admitted as a formal mental health patient. It was at this time he was given a better understanding about the tools that would help him understand who he was, how to live with the feelings and thoughts that he has, and how to control them. Giving him the strength and understanding to take control of his life.
"What stuck with me the most was to set a goal. A real goal."
One that would push him in all areas of his life. For him, it was to race stock cars again, something he had done growing up. Within one year using the tools and coping mechanism learned from the doctors he was able to completely turn his life around, reached his goal and was an amateur paid race car driver. Within less than one year he reached that goal and knew he done something special.
He began sharing his story and using his race car as a tool to create conversations, raise awareness and fundraise. With support and guidance from Dana Munn (Didsbury Car Club President), he was given an opportunity to begin sharing his story and helping others understand they are not alone, and tools they can use to help them cope.
#RacingToSaveLives and SAM was born.
SAM found a lot of success with the campaign with a lot of help from the Didsbury Car Club Of Alberta, Derek's friends, race teams, sponsors and other organizations, Racing To Save Lives & Derek gained the attention of CTV, Race Time Radio, and NASCAR Pinty's Series.
It got to big too fast. Without proper support, and the personal circumstances he was under, he gave it all up - its not what he wanted for himself. He wanted to race his car, and help others. He was not mentally prepared for what it was beginning to be - $30,000 sponsorship deals.
Yet, he knew in his heart he wanted to help people. He made the decision he wanted to experience and support life in Northern Canada - where the mental illness, addiction and suicide rate is among the highest in the country; Nunavik. He moved to Inukjuak, one of 14 Inuit communities in the far remote north.
He did his best to get involved with the community and was accepted. He was a member of the Suicide Prevention Committee, spoke at the church, and the school reached out when there was a suicide in the community. It was a humbling experience. He took the time to understand the harsh realties of life in the North and began creating a life he’d never have imagined.
"The greatest moment of my life would also be my most difficult."
While living in the North, he fell in love, and had a son. Tunu was born April 9th 2021. His mother and Derek did not have a peaceful relationship during her pregnancy. He was not involved and didn’t get to experience what it was like to feel his child's first kick, or hear his heart beat. His work removed me from the community due to "safety concerns". It was an extremely difficult time in his life because all odds were against him doing his best to do the right thing for his child, to be involved in my sons life regardless of circumstances, relationships and to not run away but was being pushed away.
Although it was difficult he remained in the North doing his best to understand the situation - hurt people, hurt people.
His capacity for understanding and forgiveness was tested, in order to be involved in his son’s life he had to learn and rise to the challenge. Forgiveness is not an easy thing to truly understand. Allowing this into his life, allowed the peace between his mother and him so that he could develop a relationship with his son. Very profound and humbling for anyone who listens to the story. True peace, forgiveness and understanding was found, a very beautiful moment for two parents. They had done it, managed to find the peace and mutual understanding they needed for a peaceful relationship for their son.
Derek met son on August 3rd 2021, it was the greatest day of his life. They spent 3 beautiful days together, just the two of them.
He respected and appreciated this opportunity. His sons mother, was terrified Derek was going to take their son down "south", Ottawa. Still, against all advice she was getting, she allowed him the opportunity to meet his son - a mothers love for her son cannot be put into words. She is a beautiful woman.
Tunu turned four months old on August 9th 2021, he was such a happy active little guy. He passed away on August 16th, it was very tragic and devastating news. Crushing everything Derek had been working so hard towards.
Having to deal with his son’s death, in far remote northern Canada without any family member or close friends around in a community he was recently removed from was one of the most mentally challenging moments of his life. He found a lot of strength in himself.
After laying his son to rest he quickly realized the lack of resources available for those in need in the North. Derek was fortunate to be able to come down south, to Ottawa to seek proper medical attention but there are for too many struggling in the north who will never get proper help or have that opportunity.
Derek feels the world has too many who will never reach out because of fear due to the stigma around mental illness, his goal is to show others they are not alone in their battles creating an open environment for discussion.
Derek wants to continue sharing his story, the battles he overcomes every day in hopes of showing others they are not alone. That there are ways and tools to cope. No matter how hard and how difficult the situation, it does get better.
Thank you for continuing to follow our journey and support our goal to end the stigma, and save lives.
